Appreciating the battle

I can't honestly say that I love the time in my life when I find myself in the midst of a battle.  I can't say that it is easy and that it feels like a walk in the park.    

But I can honestly say is that I have learned to truly appreciate them.  At the end, I can turn around and see what I have been through, how I have grown and how that battle has shaped me into more of the person that I am becoming.  

Since I have been home, I have had to put on the armor of God and fight a battle that isn't fun, but I refuse to let it kill me.  So for a little over two weeks I have been faithfully putting on my armor and doing what I have been called to do for this time.  I have to tell the truth it hasn't been easy and there has been many days that all I do is cry.  Cry for what could have been and for what will never be.  At least not in the near future.

And then in the midst of my desert God shows me where I can rest and i see once again that, "The Lord is my shepherd; I have everything I need.  He lets me rest in green meadows; He leads me beside peaceful streams. He renews my strength... and my cup overflows with blessings."

  I had the wonderful opportunity this weekend to spend it with two people that couldn't mean more to me.  I sat in an atmosphere quite different.  I could relax and just for a short day and a half I didn't have to fight.  I wasn't on the defensive.  I was able to relax and take in the peace, calm and joy that was all around.  I loved having the chance to relax and yet be refreshed and encouraged to keep fighting the fight.

 So I am again placed in the middle of the battle field renewed and ready for what may come my way, fully trusting that when I need it the Lord will provide another quiet place so that He can renew my strength.

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